Editor in Chief: Moh. Reza Huwaida Monday, April 29th, 2024

Reinforcing Human Bonds!

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Reinforcing Human Bonds!

Relationships are connection between persons. We share a relationship with our family, with friends and most important of all we share a relationship with our creator. Relationships can be personal, impersonal, close or distant. A personal relationship would be a relationship on your own personal time. An impersonal relationship would be a relationship with the public. A close relationship would be someone who lives close to you or a family member. A distant relationship would be a relationship you share with someone who you know who lives far away from you and you can only talk to them on the phone or through Internet. 

One of the most important relationship lessons I learned is, "The relationships we have with other people are projections of the relationships we have within ourselves. Our external relationships and our internal relationships are in fact the same relationships. They only seem different because we look at them through different lenses."

Let's consider why this is true. Where do all your relationships exist? They exist in your thoughts. Your relationship with another person is whatever you imagine it to be. Whether you love someone or hate someone, you're right. Now the other person may have a completely different relationship to you, but understand that your representation of what someone else thinks of you is also part of your thoughts. So your relationship with someone includes what you think of that person and what you believe s/he thinks of you. You can complicate it further by imagining what the other person thinks you think of him/her, but ultimately those internal representations are all you have.

Even if your relationships exist in some objective reality independent of your thoughts, you never have access to the objective viewpoint. You are always viewing your relationships through the lens of your own consciousness. The closest you can get to being objective is to imagine being objective, but that is in no way the same thing as true objectivity. That's because the act of observation requires a conscious observer, which is subjective by its very nature.

At first it might seem troublesome that you can never hope to gain a truly accurate, 100% objective understanding of your relationships. You can never escape the subjective lens of your own consciousness. That would be like trying to find the color blue with a red lens permanently taped over your eyes. That doesn't stop people from trying, but such attempts are in vain.

 If you fall into the trap of trying to think of your relationships as objective entities that are external to you, you'll be using an inescapably inaccurate model of reality. Consequently, the likely outcome is that you'll frustrate yourself to no end when it comes to human relationships. You'll make relating to other people a lot harder than it needs to be. Intuitively you may know something is off in your approach to relationships, but you'll remain stuck until you realize that every relationship you have with another person is really a relationship that exists entirely within yourself.

Fortunately, once you embrace the subjective nature of relationships, you'll have a much easier time relating to people. It's easier to get where you want to go when you have an accurate map. The subjective view of relationships implies that you can change or improve your relationships with others by working on the internal relationships within yourself.  Furthermore, you can improve your internal relationships, such as your self-esteem, by working on your relationships with others. Ultimately it's all the same thing.

The most important and the most highly paid form of intelligence in America is social intelligence, the ability to get along well with other people. Fully 85 percent of your success in life is going to be determined by your social skills, by your ability to interact positively and effectively with others and to get them to cooperate with you in helping you to achieve your goals.

Learning how to develop and maintain superior human relationships can do more for your career and for your personal life than perhaps anything else you can accomplish. The bad news is that the inability to get along with others is the primary reason for failure, frustration and unhappiness in life and work.  According to one study, more the 95 percent of men and women let go from their jobs over a ten year period were fired because of poor social skills rather than lack of competence or technical ability.

According to Sydney Jourard (Canadian psychologist remembered most for his book on the psychology of self-disclosure), most of your joy in life comes from your happy relationships with other people, and most of your problems in life come from unhappy relationships with them. Most of your problems in life are people problems.

An insight to understanding of Human Relations helps us in our lives because it is an important tool for personal and professional development of human beings. It helps us to improve interpersonal relations, as they play a key role in developing the whole person.

Through relationships, individuals have reached an important social reinforcement of the immediate surroundings that have helped them to their adaptation. But on the contrary, the lack of these skills has led them to rejection, isolation and ultimately limited the quality of life.

The general themes about the importance of human relationships that can help us gain a better development in our daily lives. First of all, in the context of human relationships, the communication plays an important role because it is through communication that I could create and I maintain all types of relationships such as family, social and labor.

To achieve the development of our relationships have been necessary to study and understand the importance of human relationships in order to make communication a necessary tool for us and especially to develop strong relationships that benefit our love to all stakeholders and the society that surrounds us. On the other hand, thoughtful human relations help us to strengthen our goals, taking the opportunity to create win – win   situations, and achieve what we really want, and taking in consideration the goals and needs of the people are around us.

Proper care and distinctiveness might tie the untied relations; narrowing the rifts of relation due to random oversight. Apart from being acquainted with psychological and behavioral aspects of binding relations tireless effort to adjoin the distant relations, we must learn deep that good attitude, helping, trusting, respecting, hastening in forgiveness are also essential supplements of strengthening relations.

Asmat yari is permanent writer of Daily outlook Afghanistan. He can be reached at asmatyari@gmail.com

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